Movie: White Noise

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White Noise
Length: 1 hour, 41 minutes
Studio: Universal Pictures
Website: http://www.whitenoisemovie.com/
Release Date: 2005-01-14
Cast: Michael Keaton, Deborah Kara Unger, Chandra West, Ian McNeice, Amber Rothwell
Director: Geoffrey Sax
Screenwriter: Niall Johnson
WorkNameSort: White Noise
Our Rating: 2.00

Let's see: a supernatural thriller about electronic messages from the dead? Starring Michael Keaton? And hitting theaters right after most awards deadlines have passed? Hey, it could be good. Hahaha. No, it couldn't. TV-spawned director Geoff Sax's contribution to the traditional January-release boneyard – and to Keaton's rapidly rotting career – gets nominal play out of the paranormal staple of EVP (electronic voice phenomena), in which restless souls contact us Earth-bound types through TVs, radios and other traditionally neutral communications devices. While the premise is wholly adequate, it's been put in the service of a threadbare, progressively incoherent plot about a recently widowed architect's (Keaton) brush with potentially murderous phantoms. If you loved those Batman shots of the actor staring intently at his computer, rest assured that they're approximated over and over again throughout this woefully inert film, in which our hero spends mucho late nights poring over fuzzy images of doom traveling down a wire from the great beyond. Our screening was co-sponsored by Bright House Networks, which I assumed was a subtle cross-marketing pitch for the crystal clarity of cable.

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