by Billy Manes
Yay! So we were just at Dancers Royale (shut up), minding our own business and avoiding brushes with wayward nipples, when our phone vibrated with the most exciting news since Savannah shooting herself on Billy Manes' toilet! Our favorite voice of rednecked reason -- and Monsters/O-Rock infamy -- the Sexy Savannah is scheduled to be on The Tonight Show with Conan O'Brien tomorrow night (NBC, Friday, August 27, 11:30 p.m.). Wait, what?
"I'm going to be handling snakes," she caterwauled. "I'm a snake handler!"
As some of you know, Savannah's out in California now pursuing The Big Dream, but mostly working odd jobs that involve reptiles and reptile food and stuff. By some stroke of luck, that avocation is about to land her in the big time, making Conan's red mane shiver while the world looks at her fabulous breasts! This is so exciting. Will her feminine wiles land her in the spotlight in time for a gratuitous vadge shot and a beautifully choreographed meltdown? Here's hoping.
"I may be living in my car soon, but I'm going to be on The Tonight Show!" she squealed.
God bless America.