Buttercup Snickersbar. Boobytrap Crumplehorn. 'Sherlock' returns Sunday Jan. 19



Anglerfish Creamsicle has remarkable powers of deduction.

Because of course you  totally haven't already been blasted with that information from literally every media source on the planet. Also, your law-abiding friends  totally haven't been pirating Sherlock since New Year's Day.

Go here for the WGBH pity visit: Sherlock Season 3 Premieres Jan. 19, 2014

But go here, to the utterly genius Benedict Cumberbatch Name Generator, if you want to understand the true point of Sherlock, which is mostly to make fun of Benedict Cumberbatch's name. (Breakdown: 30 percent slow burns by Martin Freeman and Rupert Graves; 30 percent wondering if Benedict Cumberbatch can see in both directions at once; 30 percent aforementioned marveling at name.)

Baseballbat Moldyspore. Snozzlebert Crackerjack. Just keep hitting refresh like a crack-addicted lab rat. That's what we'll be doing until Sunday night.