That feeling when you get asked to carve the turkey:
That feeling when your vegetarian cousin gets asked to carve the turkey:
How to human up and just get it done: Esquire
magazine, that temple of all things manly, published "How to Carve a Turkey in Five Steps: This is a manly exercise worth practicing before Thanksgiving. Trust us
" earlier this year. We say carving isn't just boys' stuff, so here's how, everybody:
Tools: 8-inch chef's knife, 12-inch serrated carving knife
1. Place the turkey on a cutting board and remove the legs and thighs: While pulling the thigh back away from the breast, use your chef's knife to make small, rapid cuts into the skin, eventually exposing the joint. Then pull the entire leg-and-thigh portion away from the bird with enough force to crack the joint. Cut all the way through and remove the leg, and then do the same with the wings.
2. Once you've separated the legs and wings, the drumsticks should easily pull away from the thighs. Set the drumsticks aside. Remove the meat from the thighs by scraping it from the bone with the chef's knife. Once it's off the bone, slice the meat with your chef's knife. (Leave the drumsticks and wings intact. Because they look cool.)
3. For the breast, make one long lateral cut with a chef's knife along the side until you reach the rib cage.
4. Make another cut from the sternum down along the rib cage until you've reached the location of the first cut. Remove the whole thing (it should resemble one fourth of a football cut lengthwise) and place it on the cutting board.
5. With the serrated carving knife, cut the breast into ½-inch-thick slices, careful to keep the skin on each slice. Serve.
Check out the rest of Esquire
's holiday how-tos here