We were banging our heads on our desks, trying to think of how to properly express the artistry of William Martin “Billy” Joel, when it occurred to us: Go back to the music! That’s right, always go back to the “music.” The music of a man who has not written or recorded any new material since 1993 yet still brings the heat for thousands of people on the road. We know a lot of people really hated the Joelster, but we liked some of his songs. “The Longest Time” is a sweet little love song, and Joel made “Uptown Girl” back when music videos meant something, dammit. But then, we heard it. First in “Piano Man” (“the businessmen slowly get stoned ... sharing a drink they call loneliness”), then on “Captain Jack” (“so you play your albums, and you smoke your pot ... but still you’re aching for the things that you haven’t got”): contempt for pot smokers. That’s right, old Billy boy, rehab MVP, has beef with reefer. What did we ever do to you, Billy?! Did we not have the energy to get up and dance around to your damn song in that piano bar and that’s why you hate us? Either way, we guarantee that some Baby Boomer is going to sneak a very thin joint into the Amway Center this Friday and have the time of their life. Try not to overreact like in the video below, Billy Joel.
8 p.m. Friday, Jan. 27 | Amway Center, 400 W. Church St. | 800-745-3000 | amwaycenter.com | $49.50-$149.50