Our coughing, steroid-riddled president wants to hold a rally in Florida on Saturday


  • Official White House Photo by Joyce N. Boghosian
Donald Trump, America's infectious, 'roided-up president who tested positive for coronavirus just a week ago today, says he wants to hold a rally in Florida on Saturday.

Trump called in to Hannity Thursday night, and in between a few very audible coughing fits, announced that he clearly doesn’t mind putting his supporters at risk. “I think I’m going to try doing a rally on Saturday night if we have enough time to put it together,” said Trump. "But we want to do a rally in Florida, probably in Florida, on Saturday night.”

The president followed this up by stating he’s planning another rally in Pennsylvania Sunday night. “It’s incredible what’s going on. I feel so good,” said Trump, who says he was “cured” by experimental antiviral drug remdesivir, which is developed from aborted fetal kidney tissue. 

Coincidentally, later in the interview Trump referred to abortions as “early term executions.”

The president is contagious and travel would violate guidelines set by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. Trump’s administration has also refused to answer questions regarding whether or not the president has recently tested negative for COVID-19.

This may be why, less than 24 hours after Trump had his fun with Hannity, his staff announced there would in fact be no rally. (And our sympathies go out to the Trump campaign staffer who called the paper to inform us about the rally, ask us to cover it, then had to call back to cancel, all on the same day.)

When asked by Hannity if he had a test since testing positive last week, Trump said: “Well what we’re doing is, probably the test will be tomorrow. The actual test, because there’s no reason to test all the time.”

Meanwhile, at least Herman Cain’s Twitter account is still alive.

This story first appeared on our sister paper's site, Creative Loafing Tampa.

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