We've all experienced it at least once. You know, “that one night,” when you drank way too much of a certain alcohol and made a total ass-hat of yourself, leading to sobering dramatic proclamations like “I'm never drinking again!”
In my case, the night in question, according to non-belligerent recollections, involved an indiscriminate amount of Montezuma tequila and an extended stay in a rank, wall-scribbled bar bathroom. Needless to say (or maybe not), since then I've enjoyed my fair share of margaritas (see: the discovery of Patron). And surprisingly enough, tequila currently resides among my top booze choices - must've been an antibody-type reaction.
What better reason to raise a shot glass of tequila than for Cinco de Mayo, right? Never mind that - despite popular belief - Cinco de Mayo is not Mexico's version of Independence Day, but instead “The Day of the Battle of Puebla,” which commemorates the Mexican army's triumph over the French. As Americans, we find any excuse to party. And this year, Orlando certainly shows up, with block parties, drinking game tournaments, live Mariachi bands and authentic Mexican food. Consider it our own conquest over another pseudo-holiday - looking at you, St. Patrick's Day.
And, most importantly, remember in this order: salt, shot, lime.
15th Annual Cinco de Mayo Bash Margarita and drink specials, Mexican food and three live bands. 4 p.m.-2 a.m. Saturday; Adobe Gila's, 9101 International Drive; free; 407-903-1477;
Cerveza Fest Beer Olympics Four-person teams compete in drinking games, with all-you-can-drink beer, live music and Mexican food.
7 p.m. Saturday; The West End Trading Company, 202 S. Sanford Ave., Sanford; $10; 407-322-7475; drinkatwestend.com.
Chico's de Mayo One-year anniversary street party with Mariachi music, pinatas, food and drink specials. 11 a.m.-2 a.m. Saturday; Chico's Dirty Tacos and Tequila, 50 E. Central Ave.; free; 407-422-6299; chicosdirtytacos.com.
Cinco de Limo Best sombrero and mustache contest and live music by Bubba “Whoop Ass” Wilson. 2 p.m. Saturday; Wekiva Island, 1014 Miami Springs Road, Longwood; $1; 407-862-1500; wekivaisland.com.
Cinco de Mayo Rogue Chipotle Ale on tap and Mexican food by Big Bruno's Bites. 5 p.m. Saturday; Redlight Redlight, 745 Bennett Road; free; 407-893-9832; redlightredlightbeer parlour.com.
Cinco de Mayo Dueling pianos and drink specials on Corona, margaritas and blue margarita buckets. 6 p.m. Saturday; Howl at the Moon Saloon, 8815 International Drive; $10; howlatthemoon.com.
Cinco de Mayo Dos Equis beer specials, raffles, prizes and live music by the James Boyd Band. Noon-2 a.m. Saturday; World of Beer, 1125 Townpark Ave., Lake Mary; free; 407-878-6693; wobusa.com.
Cinco de Mayo Screening of the film Once Upon a Time in Mexico, with food and drink specials, Mariachi music and more. 11 a.m. Saturday; Eden Bar at the Enzian, 1300 S. Orlando Ave., Maitland; free; 407-629-1088; enzian.org.
Cinco de Mayo Block Party Drink specials and music by Under the Influence, the Whitey Tighties, Los Mariachis and more. Noon-2 a.m. Saturday; Wall Street Plaza, Wall and Court streets; free-$10; 407-849-0471; wallstplaza.net.
Cinco de Mayo: Kentucky Derby Party Drink specials, Mexican food and showing of the Kentucky Derby. Noon-2 a.m. Saturday; The Gnarly Barley, 7431 S. Orange Ave.; free; 407-854-4999; thegnarlybarley.com.
Cinco de Mayo Party Margaritas, tequila shot specials, burritos and more. 7 a.m.-2 a.m. Saturday; The Hideaway, 516 Virginia Drive; free; 407-898-5892; thehideawaybar.net.
Cinco de Mayo Party Beer specials, music and more. 11 a.m.-2 a.m. Saturday; World of Beer, 3402 Technological Drive, Suite 201; free; 321-235-9741; wobusa.com.
Cinco de Mayo: Viva la Cerveza! 11 a.m.- 2 a.m. Saturday; World of Beer, 155 Cranes Roost Blvd., Altamonte Springs; free; 407-834-2337; altamonte.wobusa.com.
Cinco, Sax, Salsa Live music, costume contest and a salsa competition. 9 p.m. Saturday; Little Fish Huge Pond, 309 E. First St., Sanford; free, $10 entry for salsa competition; 407-221-1499; littlefish-hugepond.com.
Cinco de Mayo Pub Crawl Stops at Chiller's, Ember and a block party downtown. 8 p.m. Saturday; Wall Street Cantina, 19 N. Orange Ave.; $10-$17; 407-420-1515; orlandopubcrawl.com.
Drinko de Mayo Free mustache ride shots, tequila worm shots and other drink specials. 2 p.m.-2 a.m. Saturday; Downtown Orlando, Orange Avenue and Church Street; free;
Mucho de Mayo Street party with Dos Equis specials, tequila shots, food and music by Trainwreck Mariachi Band and Dukes of Swagger. Noon Saturday; Mucho Tequila and Tacos, 101 S. Eola Drive; free; 407-843-9676; muchoorlando.com.
Sink Hole de Mayo Party With music by Afeefa & the Boy, Keri Chamberlin and Max, Kelly Craven, Mad Sexual Genius and more. 11 a.m.-2 a.m. Saturday; Austin's Coffee, 929 W. Fairbanks Ave., Winter Park; free; 407-975-3364; austinscoffee.com.