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Is it a …

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... physical ailment or island getaway?
 
PHYSICAL AILMENT
ISLAND GETAWAY
Seychelles  
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Shingles
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Bora Bora  
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Beriberi
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Dry Tortugas  
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Montezuma's Revenge
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… potato-chip flavor or an Antonio Banderas movie?
 
CHIP FLAVOR
BANDERAS MOVIE
Lay's Classic
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Original Sin  
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White Cheddar
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The White River Kid  
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Two Much  
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Double Crunch
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Jalapeño Heat
?

… dance craze or a backyard wrestler?
 
DANCE CRAZE
WRESTLER
The Waterbug
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The Lizard  
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The Snail Creep
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The Sandman  
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The Retarded Butcher  
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Da Butt
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The Jew Cashew  
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The Mashed Potato
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… personal problem or a reason for crop failure?
 
PROBLEM
CROP FAILURE
Drought  
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Gout
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DDT  
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STD
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Canker
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Hurricane damage in the growing regions  
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… Charles Dickens character or an argument for tossing your iPod?
 
DICKENS
TOSS IPOD
Jethro Tull  
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Uriah Heep
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Artful Dodger
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Amon Duul  
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Tiny Tim
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Tommy Traddles
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Tommy Tune  
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… international airline or an exotic dining option?
 
AIRLINE
EXOTIC DINING
Lutefisk  
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Lufthansa
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Swissair
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Swiss roll  
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Aer Lingus
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Cunnilingus  
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… school of philosophy or a reason to visit metro Orlando?
 
PHILOSOPHY
VISIT ORLANDO
Situationism
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Positive realism
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Cultural tourism  
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Nihilism
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Existentialism
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Creationism
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… weekly newspaper or a poker hand?
 
WEEKLY PAPER
POKER HAND
Georgia Straight
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Straight Flush  
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Gambit
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Full House  
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Ace Weekly
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High Card  
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Dallas Observer
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… Broadway musical or a chapter from Heidi Fleiss' autobiography?
 
BROADWAY
FLEISS CHAPTER
Seven Brides for Seven Brothers
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Call Me Madam
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Anything Goes
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The Most Happy Fella
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Stop the World, I Want to Get Off
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Rent
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… quote from Al Capone or Dick Nixon?
 
CAPONE
NIXON
"Don't you get the idea I'm one of those goddamn radicals. Don't get the idea I'm knocking the American system."
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"I am an introvert in an extrovert profession."  
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"Vote early and vote often."
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"Let the bastards twist slowly in the wind."  
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"I'm sick of the job. It's a thankless one and full of grief. I've been spending the best years of my life as a public benefactor."
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"I would have made a good pope."  
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"I want this guy dead! I want his family dead! I want his house burned to the ground! I want to go there in the middle of the night and piss on his ashes!"  
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