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On Netflix, 'Indian Matchmaking' uses 'the methods of the past' to pair off millennials – plus seven more streaming premieres

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Premieres Thursday: The House of Ho – When Crazy Rich Asians became a breakout hit, industry-watchers predicted that representation of Asians in the media was about to skyrocket. Cue me, under my breath: "Just as long as they're rich." Sure enough, here comes The House of Ho, a docuseries about Vietnamese-born banking/real estate magnate Binh Ho and his family. I'm waiting with bated breath for the season finale, in which the kids will doubtless leak Dad's tax returns to the New York Times. 'Cause that's how we roll over here, Hos! (HBO Max)

Indian Matchmaking – Pitched as an old-fashioned alternative to today's app-based dating culture, this eight-episode reality series sees matchmaker Sima Tiparia helping young clients find a mate via "the methods of the past." Which I can only take as a sick burn at Patti Stanger. (Netflix)

Lake of Death – A woman makes a pilgrimage to the death site of her twin brother in the second filmed adaptation of Norway's seminal horror novel, which was first published all the way back in 1942. I guess now we know where all that Norwegian death metal came from. (Shudder)

Fatal Affair – Nia Long plays a lawyer who dallies with a man (Omar Epps) who isn't her husband, only to become the target of his violent fixation. Hmm, that sure sounds like something else we've seen. Something that also had "fatal" in the title. Oh, well; at least this time any bunny that gets boiled will be seasoned properly. (Netflix)

Premieres Friday: Absentia Season 3 – FBI agent Emily Byrne is back, teaming up with her ex-husband to take on a criminal enterprise with a global reach. Meanwhile, you can't even get your S.O. to wipe down the damn Peloton now that he's home all the time. (Amazon Original Series)

Cursed – Forty-five years after Monty Python and the Holy Grail, it's still just about impossible to think of the Lady of the Lake as anything other than a moistened bint lobbing scimitars. Yet Netflix seems to think there's dramatic life left in the concept of strange women lying in ponds and distributing swords. This new series explores the backstory of that farcical aquatic ceremony, checking in on the watery tart when she's still a teenager and preparing for her destiny as the enabler of Arthur, King of the Britons. I dunno, maybe she's practicing by hurling a French-fry fork at a crossing guard or something. (Netflix)

Father Soldier Son – Remember when we told you that the New York Times company's dramatic feature about a military family was going to be premiering in June? Well, please accept our heartfelt apologies for being the only people this year who've lied to you. (Netflix)

Kissing Game – Straight from today's headlines comes a Brazilian series about teenagers who are thrown into a panic by a contagion that's transmitted via simple kissing. Listen, if I thought an active amorous life was the only way to catch the 'vid, I'd be sleeping a lot better at night. You too, huh? (Netflix)

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