HOT BONDI TIME MACHINE
It all seemed like a woefully benign and apolitical affair as, uh, politicians gathered on New Year’s Eve to commemorate the passing of 500 rich Florida years – there’s actually a thing called the Viva Florida 500 celebration occurring outside of your pay grade right now – by burying a time capsule for those who might care to open such things in 2095.
For the most part, the items included on the official list (some of which are digital and have been placed on a disk that will likely be unreadable in 81 years) were of the ornamental and celebratory variety – including a “24 kt. gold finish limited edition Viva Florida 500 Quincentennial holiday ornament” and a “flyer on the Florida Artists Hall of Fame” that nobody knows about. Oh, and a lapel pin!
All 67 counties submitted baubles, and Orange threw in a USB stick of the county library newsletter (yay?) in addition to an April picture of Mayor Teresa Jacobs, county commissioners and sundry children all deleting texts from their cell phones. So, just like your fourth grade time capsule, then.
But, then a certain so-and-so who likes to barge into parties with only her intentions in mind came traipsing in with her contribution. Attorney General Pam Bondi claims to own the failed legal case against Obamacare (even though it was launched by her horse-faced predecessor Bill McCollum), and she thinks it will add a little spark to the party, a little hitch to the giddy-up. She is the spiking of the punch.
“Attorney General Bondi submitted documents regarding the ACA due to Florida’s leading role in the case and the case’s legal significance,” her spokesperson told political website The Florida Current. In other words, if the bottom falls out from under affordable healthcare for the country, she will be LEGEND! Don’t mind her. She’ll pass out soon enough.