(2010-6423) 12:15 a.m.: A man walked out of a bar … and two other guys followed him out of Whiskey River Whiskey Store to the corner of Hames Avenue and Robinson Street, then beat him up. Punch line: They took his wallet and $115.
(2010-6013) 7:03 a.m.: A woman said that a man robbed her at knife point near an ATM in the 3800 block of South Semoran Boulevard.
(2010-6184) 8:30 a.m.: Expensive stuff was stolen out of five cars in the Autumn Green subdivision. "All vehicles were unlocked," Officer April Yochelson says. "Secured vehicles at these same residences were not tampered with." Could there be a lesson here?
(2010-6937) 7:04 p.m.: A guy was biking past Colonial Terrace Apartments on West Colonial Drive when another man reached in his pocket and grabbed $40.50. The victim chased the thief into the apartments, where cops nabbed him.
(2010-8584) 5:40 p.m.: Someone broke into two apartments in The Place on Millenia Boulevard. They swiped a 42-inch flat-screen TV from one apartment and a laptop computer from the other.
(2010-9600) 8:15 a.m.: Someone broke through a gate behind the American Cancer Society office on West Colonial Drive and took the copper out of their air conditioners. "They damaged both units beyond repair," Officer Leslie Deferrari says.
(2010-9857) 11 a.m.: It's hot as hell in Sanctuary of Praise Ministries on South Kirkman Road. After somebody stole six of their air conditioners it is, anyway.
(2010-11670) 2 p.m.: Someone crawled through an air vent at Maxwell Terrace Apartments on Arlington Street. Once burdened with a TV, however, the thief decided the door was a better way to leave.
(2010-11437) 8:31 a.m.: While arresting a guy in the 700 block of West Jefferson Street on a June 2008 burglary charge, cops found two handguns — including one of their own.
(2010-11711) Noon: Someone got into a "possibly unlocked" vehicle in the 3000 block of Clubview Drive and took a GPS, money and a BMW flashlight. "This is the seventh vehicle burglary in the Ventura area during this week," Officer Danielle Khoso says.
(2010-11713) 12:30 p.m.: Cops arrested a guy in the 600 block of West Jackson Street who was "in possession of 1.5 grams of a counterfeit substance." He was accordingly placed in imaginary handcuffs and taken to a cardboard jail.
(2010-11852) 1:42 p.m.: Persons unknown kicked in the front door of a place on the 900 block of Boardman Street. They may have hauled off the two flat-screen TVs in a dark SUV.
(2010-12827) 12:30 a.m.: A guy told police he met an "unknown female" at 7-Eleven and went with her to Nassau Bay Apartments on North Orange Blossom Trail for … oh, we don't know, some perfectly innocent purpose. But when he got there, someone hit him in the neck with a stun gun (or something similar) and robbed him.
(2010-12894) 2:15 a.m.: Police were told that a man took a gun out of a car on the 700 block of Bennett Road. They chased him on foot and grabbed him as he tried to get into a car, then charged him with resisting an officer both with and without violence.
(2010-13725) 3 a.m.: Three guys said three other guys "battered and robbed" them on the corner of East Pine Street and South Orange Avenue, but they didn't report it for 15 hours.
(2010-13076) 6:06 a.m.: Cops found two men sleeping in a car at Ventura Landing Apartments on Curry Ford Road, searched them, and found 7.5 grams of cocaine, 4.5 grams of pot and a loaded gun. They arrested the guy asleep at the wheel.
(2010-13337) 10:55 a.m.: Three people played Taser tag in an apartment in the 5000 block of North Lane. Police said a woman came into her ex-boyfriend's place and tried to Taser his current girlfriend, but zapped him instead.
(OCSO) Midnight: Two female roommates at Sun Key Apartments on Key Largo Drive fell for the old "I just dented your car" line and opened the door. Five guys rushed in, waved a variety of guns, and bound them with tape in separate rooms. The men left with cash, jewelry and electronics worth $7,500.
(2010-15901) 4 a.m.: More guns on the loose! From a vehicle parked in the 4100 block of South Kirkman Road, someone took a .22-caliber rifle and 12 boxes of ammunition, plus other stuff.
(2010-16387) 11 a.m.: Burglars defeated a wimpy security measure in the 500 block of South Dollins Avenue. They came in a window and rummaged in a closet to find a small safe. "They opened the safe with a kitchen butter knife," Officer Deferrari says.
(2010-16155) 6:45 p.m.: Someone climbed through the window of a portable building at Shingle Creek Elementary School and took four computers and some snacks. "This is the second burglary committed within two weeks where computers were taken from a portable classroom," Officer Sonja Saunders email@example.com